Sonic 4, eh Sega? Somebody's getting a little ballsy around here. So I'm guessing this is Sega's last effort to please the fans who have been screaming for Sonic to be good again. Oh, but the fanbase will not be fooled like you did them with Sonic Unleashed. Sega, you're trying to save fans you've already lost, and even if it's good, nobody will play it because nobody trust you......which is what I like to say, but we all know how Sonic fans are gonna react. They're gonna buy it, bitch about it, and I (and every other reviewer) will be there to tell them I told you so. I could rip it like I normally do, but a man with integrity doesn't make judgments on something he has not witnessed himself....what? I have integrity. It's around here somewhere. So instead of just expecting it to fail, I'm gonna tell you why this may work out, then tell you how it might fail.
First, it's not developed by Sonic Team. It's pretty obvious that any with a brain at Sonic Team has long since abandoned the company after sensing that the new staff might be...how should I put this...FUCKIN RETARDED! It seems like with all the "great ideas" Sonic Team keeps forgetting that they're making Sonic games. By all means experiment, but after a while it's time to cut that shit out. I bet Sonic Team was suppose to make Sonic 4, but was pulled out after pitching yet another dumb fuckin idea. This game is actually be developed by Dimps, creators of the fuckin awesome Sonic Advance series and the less sucky version of Sonic Unleashed. That alone boosted expectations.
Sonic 4 takes place right after the events of Sonic and Knuckles. Yea, it's a direct sequel to the Genesis games. That almost like one great big fuck you to all the Sonic games after it, which is why I called them ballsy for it. According to them, this is old school Sonic with the only new edition being the homing attack. If that remains true, then Sega would have finally listened to the fans and given the world what it really wants. Now if they could just figure out how to cross-brand Mario and Sonic without it being gay.....
In the end though, it's still a Sonic game, and everyone knows by now that Sonic can't be trusted. This was mostly what they said about Sonic Unleashed so you figure sooner or later, they'll unveil the new more retarded plot device or gameplay mechanic that'll make everyone's eyes bleed from the inside out God of War style (I've never seen that in a God of War game, but it should be in one). Maybe it won't happen in episode 1, but hey, who knows how many episodes there will be. Plenty of opportunities to screw it up. But wait! What's a new Sonic game without a new character? A new character who really adds nothing to the exposition or gameplay and just flat out means nothing in the grand scheme of things except maybe to piss you right the fuck off has pretty much become as normal as...well Tuesday. Someone you won't like will show up, and all you can do is pray to whoever you pray to that you don't have to play with them. Of course, where they can really screw up is its speed. Ever played Sonic Rivals for PSP or Sonic the Hedgehog for 360? Of course not, but if you did, you would know that both games are ruined by slow speeds. Dimps hasn't fucked that up in past games, but looking at the trailer doesn't fill me with hope.
This summer huh? We'll see.
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